pity my brain now...
its so mess...
so many thing pushing me to think
and of course some of it is unnecessary
and yeah...
it make me cry today...
when it too many wish which i hope to fulfill
but it does not on plan...
big work with small pocket
it will never suit forever...
i want to bury all the promises
which sounds so sweet like macaroons
mahu cessss kuat2 dlm hati...arghhhhhh
and PTPTN you are included..
damn u...u make everything stuck in the middle
i go for a shop so many time
but just to see it..without any goods or receipts
i do tired doing survey everything what should i buy..
which one is offer the best..
but at last when i go several times but I still could not buy it
it FRUSTRATED
the prob is...i feel old enough to gain or to request money from parents..
baba can i have some money to buy prepaid?
mama can i have some money to go to pasar malam to buy yong tau fu?...
mama, i want money...my cleanser is clean already...
tiredlah mintak duit...
tired
tiredd
the most needed thing right now is spec...
it tiring when u have to wake up very early in the morning to send ur baby to school...but u have to bersusah payah jolokkan mata with the lenses..
i have to face the same situations almost a month...
it feel unhealthy...seriously...
parents offer money...but i refused..
because i need them to spend it for more important thing which i really need it soon...so now for small thing as this..i have to be patient waiting for mambang like PTPTN...
its a LOAN oke...not a scholar...so plz dont make us waiting mcm xperlu bayar balik..huh...
and for beautiful with intelligence...
right now its just a dream...
maybe i wont have it when all the deal left the deal itself...
im talking about thing and it not refer to people
go away with the mistaken
and for someone i love...which i claim her as a sister...even we are not...which seems like hiding from me now..its really make me feel pain...so deep inside...what i do care much is we have blood relation...and i luv u so much...but i dont know why...it always have a distance between us...i try to make it closer...but yet...if it come from one side only..it will never work...
Dear Allah...only U know..how i feel now..about me and her...
hope the relation will not end macam tue sahaja...
if so...it super sadis.
.....one day in a very gloomy day.....
when my resume is not done yet
when i never open my buku persediaan mengajar
when i never think about RPH
when i never stick on my mind how scared teaching is
when i never imagine when Dr Zahari come to observe me
when actually im not ready yet to teach..
when the content is EMPTY
when all this happen
i want to say something to me now...
PADAN MUKA...U ARE THE GREAT TIME WASTER.
p/s : from this moment i will be very busy...everything have to settle down in this couple 2 weeks.
